Homer Simpson Quotes (97 - 104 out of 150)

As the patriarch of the Simpsons clan, Homer Simpson provides the most laughs, the most quotes and the most entertainment of any character on television. A caring, albeit oblivious, father of three, Homer can be found at his nuclear power plant job, at Moe's bar, or on the couch.

Cpt. McNeil: I like the cut of your jib.
Homer: What's a jib?
Cpt. McNeil: Promote this man.
Quote Rating: 8.3 outta 10 - Vote Now!

Homer: When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!
Quote Rating: 8.2 outta 10 - Vote Now!

Homer: I've gone back in time to when dinosaurs weren't just confined to zoos.
Quote Rating: 8.2 outta 10 - Vote Now!

Homer: "You know, the one with all the well meaning rules that don't work out in real life, uh, Christianity"
Quote Rating: 8.2 outta 10 - Vote Now!

Homer: Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose; it's how drunk you get.
Quote Rating: 8.2 outta 10 - Vote Now!

Grandpa: Are we there yet?
Homer: No
Grandpa: Are we there yet?
Homer: No
Grandpa: Are we there yet?
Homer: No
Grandpa: ........Where are we going?
Quote Rating: 8.2 outta 10 - Vote Now!

Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible.
Lisa: Really? Where?
Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
Quote Rating: 8.2 outta 10 - Vote Now!

Homer: Fame was like a drug.  But what was even more like a drug were the drugs.
Quote Rating: 8.2 outta 10 - Vote Now!

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Homer Simpson Quotes (97 - 104 out of 150)

He's funny and fat