Religion Quotes (9 - 16 out of 33)
The Simpsons may not be the most dedicated church going family in the world, but religion certainly does play a role in their lives. From avoiding Sunday sermons to praying in their own style, the family has used its spiritual beliefs, or lackthereof, in a variety of humorous situations.
Krusty: So, have a merry Christmas, a happy Hanukkah, a kwaazy Kwanza, a tip-top Tet, and a solemn, dignified, Ramadan. And now a word from MY god, our sponsors!
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8.3 outta 10
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Homer: "You know, the one with all the well meaning rules that don't work out in real life, uh, Christianity"
Quote Rating:
8.2 outta 10
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Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible.
Lisa: Really? Where?
Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
Quote Rating:
8.2 outta 10
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Apu: I have come to make amends, sir. At first, I blamed you for squealing, but then I realized, it was I who wronged you. So I have come to work off my debt. I am at your service.
Homer: You're selling what, now?
Apu: I am selling only the concept of karmic realignment.
Homer: You can't sell that! Karma can only be portioned out by the cosmos.
Apu: He's got me there.
Quote Rating:
8.1 outta 10
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Homer: The lesson is: Our God is vengeful! O spiteful one, show me who to smite and they shall be smoten.
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8.1 outta 10
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Ned Flanders: They've broken every commandment except one.
Carl: Hey Lenny, covet some chili fries?
Lenny: You bet.
Ned Flanders: That's it. The whole shebang.
Quote Rating:
8.1 outta 10
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Apu: Thank you for coming. I'll see you in Hell.
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7.9 outta 10
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Bart: Christmas is a time when people of all religions come together to worship Jesus Christ.
Quote Rating:
7.8 outta 10
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